Friday night, with Glenn and Vic in tow, I made my way to the cineplex ready to watch Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with an unbiased eye. For the last couple weeks I've ignored the reviews and turned deaf ears to those folks ripping apart the latest installment in the Indy franchise. I just couldn't understand how any Indiana Jones movie could be bad. Or at least worse than Temple of Doom (not my favorite of the first three).
Well, not even five minutes into the movie, I began to realize that people had been professing truth and not unjustified lies. By the time the end credits rolled, I thought that watching Indy 2 over and over would have been much more enjoyable and fulfilling than the 4th, even risking the same nightmares that Temple gave me as a kid! Each scene seemed to expose new plot hole after new plot hole or completely illogical endeavors on the parts of Indy, Mutt (yes, that's Shia's name in the film - classy and not at all subtle), and Marion (who I was so excited to see reunited with Indy!). And Cate Blanchett's villainous Irina, at first, was the best part of the movie, then very quickly, turned out to be just as ridiculous as the rest. I was completely amazed that after trekking through the Amazonian rain forest, cascading over waterfalls, and being attacked by killer ants, no one had any scratches or dirt on them. But I did learn that if ever I find myself caught in quick sand (or whatever it was), there really is no need for a rope or tree branch: a snake will work just fine. And I feel someone recycled some choreography from a much better movie as one fight scene seemed awfully reminiscent of one from my favorite Star Wars episode (VI).
Overall, I guess I can't say I regret seeing it, I mean, I had to experience this myself, but I wish my expectations (though I really didn't have high ones) hadn't been completely crushed. Sigh. And not to sound too much like an academically brainwashed cinema student, but honestly, Spielberg and Lucas have never been my favorite directors. Don't get me wrong: I thoroughly enjoy some of their earlier works (American Graffiti, Jaws, the Original Star Wars, Raiders, E.T., The Ewok Adventure) but lately the duo - Lucas especially - have produced VERY disappointing works (prequels anyone?). No longer creative or satisfying, they are too conventional or money hungry or just bored. Or lazy - I mean who okayed the final draft of Kingdom? Seriously! The actors really can't be blamed for their blase performances, mainly because they had NOTHING to work with. And I imagine it's pretty difficult to turn away Steven Spielberg when he comes knocking on your door. Regardless of a film's artistic caliber, there's no doubt that a Spielberg-Lucas blockbuster will be a box office smash. If only they weren't, then maybe they'd stop making crap. Sigh. A dream for which this cinephile can only hope.
Well, not even five minutes into the movie, I began to realize that people had been professing truth and not unjustified lies. By the time the end credits rolled, I thought that watching Indy 2 over and over would have been much more enjoyable and fulfilling than the 4th, even risking the same nightmares that Temple gave me as a kid! Each scene seemed to expose new plot hole after new plot hole or completely illogical endeavors on the parts of Indy, Mutt (yes, that's Shia's name in the film - classy and not at all subtle), and Marion (who I was so excited to see reunited with Indy!). And Cate Blanchett's villainous Irina, at first, was the best part of the movie, then very quickly, turned out to be just as ridiculous as the rest. I was completely amazed that after trekking through the Amazonian rain forest, cascading over waterfalls, and being attacked by killer ants, no one had any scratches or dirt on them. But I did learn that if ever I find myself caught in quick sand (or whatever it was), there really is no need for a rope or tree branch: a snake will work just fine. And I feel someone recycled some choreography from a much better movie as one fight scene seemed awfully reminiscent of one from my favorite Star Wars episode (VI).
Overall, I guess I can't say I regret seeing it, I mean, I had to experience this myself, but I wish my expectations (though I really didn't have high ones) hadn't been completely crushed. Sigh. And not to sound too much like an academically brainwashed cinema student, but honestly, Spielberg and Lucas have never been my favorite directors. Don't get me wrong: I thoroughly enjoy some of their earlier works (American Graffiti, Jaws, the Original Star Wars, Raiders, E.T., The Ewok Adventure) but lately the duo - Lucas especially - have produced VERY disappointing works (prequels anyone?). No longer creative or satisfying, they are too conventional or money hungry or just bored. Or lazy - I mean who okayed the final draft of Kingdom? Seriously! The actors really can't be blamed for their blase performances, mainly because they had NOTHING to work with. And I imagine it's pretty difficult to turn away Steven Spielberg when he comes knocking on your door. Regardless of a film's artistic caliber, there's no doubt that a Spielberg-Lucas blockbuster will be a box office smash. If only they weren't, then maybe they'd stop making crap. Sigh. A dream for which this cinephile can only hope.
2 comments:
Oh man, I'm sorry you were disappointed. I haven't seen it, but I don't think I will. How about I thank you now? Thanks for saving me $10 and 2 hours.
It made my unborn children cry it was so bad. Do you think there might be a chance that Lucas doesn't realize how bad he's become? Scary.
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